In which our hero riffs about Air New Zealand, Singaporeans, frozen corn, foodieism, and the Burger King barbeque bacon burger, all in one masterful jam session. Inspired by, well, this

A little something
I never go hungry
But I'm not wildly enthusiastic about cooking
I tend to eat very, very simple food
I cook myself steak
Plus either potato
Or frozen peas
Or frozen corn
Or tomato
Or something

My Catholicism
If I'm in a hurry, it's Burger King
Or McDonald's
Occasionally KFC
Or Subway
If I'm feeling very adventurous, I eat Subway
It's very quick, very convenient
And actually I enjoy it
All of them are enjoyable
I'm catholic in my tastes
I don't want to prejudice my prospects at the others
But I actually like the Burger King barbecue bacon burger


Foodies
I'm not a foodie
In the sense that my wife is
My wife is a Singaporean
And Singaporeans tend to be real foodies
And they are therefore very focused
On exactly what kind of food they like
I like food
But you can't really describe me as a foodie


Koru Club
There are some days when I have breakfast at home
At six in the morning
And I have lunch at the Koru Club in Wellington
And dinner at the Koru Club in Christchurch
It's just food on the run
And at some times of the day, Koru Club food is not bad
Other times, it's pretty awful

With thanks to straight-faced-transcriber-extraordinaire Tom Fitzsimons, and apologies to Hart Seely, the genius behind Pieces of Intelligence: The Existential poetry of Donald H Rumsfeld.

Comments (6)

by Iain Butler on September 22, 2011
Iain Butler

...and you, Garcia Lorca, what were you doing down by the Burger King?

by alexb on September 22, 2011
alexb

I'm amazed he still gets away with 'My wife is from Singapore'

by MikeM on September 22, 2011
MikeM

It's disturbing when real life so closely mimics satire.  I had to read Brash's thing several times including coming back to it this morning before I realised it was actually him.

Speaking of which, as anyone noticed Blair's recent memoir comments that the Freedom of Informaion Act being one of his biggest mistakes in office because it "reduced trust in government"?

by donna on September 22, 2011
donna

Tee hee. Reminds me of one of John Crace's (guardian.co.uk) digested reads. But more poetic.

Honestly, does Mr Brash have any idea how balmy he actually sounds??

by william blake on September 22, 2011
william blake

Brash more JFC than KFC.

by danniel on October 29, 2013
danniel

Interesting and true... I don't know about fast foods, I was actually expecting to see less of them after all the scandals in the past. Now I am convinced that this is not going to happen anytime soon. As far as I am concerened I am only interested in healthy eating options, you may click here for more information about this. I am sure you'll find it all helpful.

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